Yesterday's Foodlog

Item:........................................(-).............Cal: 2000

- Iced Cinnamon Bun ............................340=1660

- 2pks Quaker Oatmeal (water only)280= 1380

- 8oz. 2% Milk 120= 1260

- 1 banana 100= 1160

- 8oz EggNog 180= 980

- 1 English Muffin w/Marg. 140= 840

- Glass of water 0= 840

- Arby's Reg Roast Beef 320= 520

- Sauce 15= 505

- Sobe Zero Cal LifeWater 0= 505

- Arby's Reg Roast Beef 320= 185

- Sauce 15= 170

- Tortilla Chips 140= 30

- 2 tbsp Reduced Fat Sour Cream 40= -10

- Shred Cheese 20= -30

Fuckin A! -30 calories OVER!

GRRRR

Those damn chips did me in.

Okay see my goal is to do a 2000 calorie diet for one week, then down to a 1700 calorie diet the next week, then 1600, then 1500, then 1400, then 1300, and then finally 1200. And then ride it out at 1200 for a while and hope to burn those cals off.

Maybe...

2lbs a week is a good start. IDK. I'm so desperate.

Missed Periods

So I haven't had a period in 4-ish months. I'm really starting to think my weight is the culprit. I'm just worried that if I don't get this weight off something more serious will develop. I don't get why I'm lacking the motivation to lose this crap. And literally it is crap. Nasty, slobbish, hanging fat.
You wanna see gross...Here's gross.



Do you see those fuckin' thighs or that gut. It's effin disgusting!

A little Thinspiration

So when people say thinspiration, the mind wanders to a picture of a frail little girl with ribs protruding and eyes sunk in.




I want thinspiration but not be a stick or so freak fragile, I just want to be slim maybe with a little pudge.

Then again my motivation is to look like Kate Beckinsale in Underworld. That catsuit is AMAZING.



I mean serious just look at that shit, doesn't it make you wanna vomit (but don't that could lead to bulimia). Oh the things I would do for a body that would look that good in a catsuit with weapons of lycan destruction.

Buffet Line

Well okay last night at like 10:30, Andy, Cyn & I were at Sheetz and they have donuts 2/$1 and I got Andy and I a creme filled ( I would have rather had custard) chocolate covered donut. Fuckin' A, was this shit delicioso!!! Gah.

But anyways, I'm pretty convinced that the buffet table was invented to make people eat more, thank you forefathers for our obesity epidemic. Also, when you pay $6-8 for a buffet you feel like you have to eat 5+ plates of food before you get your money's worth. Now for Andy this is no problem. He weighs roughly 140-145-ish soaking wet, so going to CiCi's pizza and polishing off 5-6 plates of pizza and brownies doesn't affect him. But I have to settle for around 2 plates or less.
ROAR thanks America. >_<

Bojangles

We had BoJangles this morning. We had to. We were hungry and yea.
I had a gravy biscuit which I'm sure was like 10,000 calories. Well more like 300ish but whatever. I'll try to work it off today. And a half of a small thing of cajun fries. And I wanted just a medium tea but they were advertising a 32oz tea for .99 but I didn't want 32 friggin ounces of tea but they gave me the damn bigger cup anyways. Not to mention it was a styrofoam cup. And anyone who knows me, knows that I detest styrofoam with a passion and only use it out of sheer necessity.
FUCK IT ALL!

PLAYLIST

So I made a new playlist in hopes that it will get me pumped and motivated.

Workout Music


Some songs only have a :30 play but if you go to my imeem profile the full song plays. It's because I have it embedded.

PostSecret...

...Gets me through my week. lol

These 3 I found interesting...




I disagree. I would rather be healthy than beautifully fat!




This one freaked me out a little. One of my cats is about to get treated for tapeworms. She has horrible diarrhea and has started pulling her hair out. I cannot imagine what those tapeworms are doing to that persons body.




Oh waa! My thighs touch, rub, and chafe themselves all the time. I barely wear dresses, skirts, or short shorts (lounge wear) because they rub together and I have to put powder between them. It drives me nuts.

I just depressed myself. I'm off to do some sit-ups!

CHERRIES!!!

I've been sorta slacking.
I need to run to my Nana's house to get water to drink but haven't got around to it.
I'll get to it today.
Without my water I feel sluggish and drab. Plus I didn't have any fruit in the house until yesterday when I got some dark cherries from the store.

I broke bad...

and bought a egg & cheese biscuit from McDonalds this morning. But believe you me, I have already regreted it and while applying for jobs this morning I parked my van at one end of the shopping center and walked my happy ass to the other end of the plaza to get where I was going.
And also, I can go to BoJangles and get a egg & cheese biscuit for $1.29. But Friggin MickeyD's was $2.02. WHAT GIVES THERE'S NO FREAKIN MEAT ON THAT.

It was greasy. It made me sick. But I did get a cup of ice water to drink with it. Which McDonalds proceeded to charged me $.10 for. Bitches.

EDIT: Did you know there is 430 calories in that one teeny tiny egg & cheese biscuit?!? NEVER AGAIN!




Looking back on the pictures of it. That thing doesn't even look remotely good. What the hell was I thinking?!?

So Tired...

I overslept.
I didn't wake up until 11am. It may have been because I got up in the middle of the night and felt like pure shit so I chugged a little NyQuil.
I always over sleep when Andy doesn't have to work. If he's still in bed it is near impossible for me to wake up.

Oh well,
For breakfast I had a very small bowl of Corn Flakes. With whole milk (GRRR). It's all we have right now. And I had a meatless taco with baby greens lettuce, sour cream, tiny mozzarella cubes, and some diced tomatoes. It was delicious.
And we have water but you can't drink the water that comes from the spigot because there is a hole in our well that causes the water to be cloudy and sometimes muddy. So I have to get water from my grandma, Nana, in empty milk jugs or extra gallon water jugs for drinking purposes.
I had to drink a glass of sweet tea because I'm out of drinking water. So now I feel bloated because of the tea.

I wish I could live off of fruit and water. Fruit just has to be so expensive.

I've got to get a work out in today...somewhere.

This is me...

See that girl in the pink shirt and pants. *sighs* That's me. As you can tell I am nowhere near physically fit. I am 20 years old and currently weight 235 as of the other day. I have a wonderful husband, Andy. Who weighs somewhere around 145-150-ish so he's your typical skinny, white boy. Which doesn't help my situation seeing as he can inhale a box of cereal and 5-6 slices of pizza and gain NOTHING. My best friends are both under 120lbs and I am the fatty in our group. I want so badly to fit into cute clothes and not the plus size department at Wal*Mart/Ross/Target wherever.

But I digress, My goal weight is 140-150 which is what I weighed in early high school.

When I met Andy in September 2006 I weighed roughly 165 which was still rather large, but Andy was visiting North Carolina for a few months and then going back to California in December '06. Well we got together, got engaged, and he had to go back to Cali for 2 months and then he was going to be moving back here to be with me. Well in those two months of him being away I ballooned to 220lbs and there I stayed. 220lbs = OH SHIT! Unfortunately, I have stayed in the 200+ range for over 2 years now.

So I have noticed that I'm having to use my inhaler more often for my Asthma. It's getting to the point where walking up the stairs at my house is getting me out of breath, simple things are causing my lungs to hurt. I always feel bloated and tired. Also the price of my inhaler went from $21 to $43, and plus sized clothes usually cost more. I want to save some money and I know my weight is causing me to spend more. Also, I have been having heart/chest pain. It's starting to worry me but I'm not the type to rush to the hospital. Albuterol is the only medication I take. And I'm convinced that any medical problems I have were probably brought on by my weight and can be improved by weight loss without the need for meds or special diets...or *gasp* surgeries.

I have halted all soda consumption, I don't even buy it anymore. If Andy wants Coke he has to get it while he's at work and it must not come home with him. I only drink water & milk which will soon be switched to Skim or 2% because I like the flavors better. I don't buy fast food at all anymore. Which, btw, I used to not like the taste of water, but I started sticking to drinking it and now I crave it. I always have my ice water bottle with me on a hot day. Sweets are allowed but sparingly and I must Must MUST learn portion control. When I eat cereal I use much smaller bowls so that I don't feel like I'm not eating much. I snack on peanuts & pretzel sticks instead of salty/greasy potato chips which I no longer buy either. I drink hot/unsweetened green tea in the mornings to give me a pump of energy. I attempt to exercise daily but I want to get a on a schedule of 30 minutes to an hour 4 times a week (Mon-Thurs, resting for Fri & weekend). When we go out to eat I still get water even though it has that cholrine/city taste. Oh well it's better than guzzling down 2 cups of Sprite. I am also learning to eat slower. I used to gobble food and of course, I was still hungry. So I now chew each bite 15-25 times and then swallow. Oh and Andy got me a set of 5lb weights (2.5 per dumbell) for my birthday.

I want to lose this weight for health purposes because let's face it, I'm terrified of dying and I want to be on earth for as long as possible. And because I want to look good for Andy. I mean he says he likes me the way I am. But how can I be happy with Andy if I'm not pleased with myself. I want to wear cute clothes and take pictures of more than just my shoulders and up. I want so many things. I'm sure my health, life, and social life would be much more pleasent if the weight were to drop.

My stats:
Current Weight: 235
Short Term Goal: 220 by June 30th
Goal Weight: 140

Height: 5'3"

Oh here's a pic of Andy...

New Blog

This blog is specifically for my weight loss progress. It will be a hopefully, day to day account, if I find the time. I want to put my exercise times in here and what I ate for the day.